What helped me in moments of doubt was picturing myself from the outside, as if I were standing next to myself and watching me sit at the computer with porn on, jerking off to it, and seeing how pathetic I look. Then a second picture: me without porn and masturbation, at the gym, at the pool, at a bar, at a club, cheerful, full of energy, confident, chatting up girls, having a good time with my friends. The urge to watch and jerk off goes away straight away. I’d also picture myself fat, sweaty, with spots on my face, stuck at the computer because I couldn’t be bothered to get off my backside, and on the other side a well-kept young man who looks after himself, develops his interests and, above all, has people to spend time with, because he has a loving girlfriend and a circle of friends.
As for how I feel since quitting, probably the most important thing I’ve noticed is that girls’ interest in me simply makes me happy. I want to be around them and talk to them. I go out and meet people on my own, I’m braver, more understanding, calmer. I’m not picky anymore, this one’s too short, that one’s too tall, this one’s too thin, that one’s two kilos too heavy. Porn warps your idea of normal women and of life.
What helped me most was falling off after about three months, when for a whole week I did nothing but watch and jerk off. That’s when I saw how big the difference is between my life with porn and my life without it. How pathetic I am when I sit at the computer wasting my one life on jerking off and watching porn. And what a completely different person I am when I don’t touch that crap.
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